My friend Carolyn told me that on Mother’s Day, Laughing Lotus Yoga Studio is offering a free yoga class to moms, 9AM on May 9.

I’m totally going–free yoga? heck yeah–but I have to wonder. How will they know we’re moms? So I imagine to myself the check-in policy tomorrow morning:

boobs like tube sox hanging down to your belly? check

sploodgy tummy from birthing babies? check

furrowed brow from deciphering lego instructions? check

perma-bags under the eyes from perpetual lack of sleep? check

yoga pants that were fashionable ten years ago (pre-children)? check

awake at 9AM on a Sunday morning because you weren’t at a totally hip bar Saturday evening? check

found your yoga class card in your jacket pocket along with 3 lifesavers, 2 small VERY IMPORTANT rocks, a half-eaten granola bar, and grimy napkin? check

have your hair in a ponytail with a sparkly Lil’Pony hair tie? check

And that’s how they’ll know we’re moms.